I look around and its dark inside, it smells, and there are way too many people around me. I look up and can see a light shining down, and wonder whats beyond that light. I look over to my right and can see someone trying to climb up towards it. I stare at them for a second and just as I am able to glance away, my attention is quickly drawn back as I watch something reach out to grab them back down.
I feel sad inside, because I was excited and thought someone was going to finally make it up to see what was beyond that light. I don't have much time to dwell on the moment, because shortly after I hear a loud thump. It was someone else falling from an attempt to make it towards the light. I attempt to rush over to help them get up, but I am cornered in and can't get to them. I peek over the crowd around me to see if someone had helped them. Instead I see people ignoring him like nothing happened.
This is how if feels to be, "A Crab in a Barrel". Everyone can see the light and wants to get to the top to see beyond it. Many will try, but in their attempt people will pull them back down. Others will try again and might fall, but there will be no one there to pick them back up. Some will make it to the top and will never come back to share the knowledge on how to get there.
For African Americans we have always had an issue with what we like to call being Crabs in a barrel. Let me make you understand how serious this issue is. "Crabs in the Barrel" is a phrase that is used to describe situations where people fight for the top and will pull anyone down that is getting ahead of them. We seem to think that there is only room for a few people at the top, and our fight to get out of the barrel becomes a war. We secretly envy those that make it, and make attempts to possibly sabotage their success. The crazy thing is that if we all worked together, maybe all of us could get out of the barrel with less struggle.
Recently, a group of friends and I started a A Young Black Business Women Support Group. Yesterday was our first meeting and we left feeling ten times more motivated and inspired to achieve than before. We helped each other map out our goals and gave each other advice on how to accomplish them. We set goals for our Support Group and vowed that no matter what we would help each other make it to the top. We found that with putting our minds together and using individual strengths to help each other would guarantee success for all of us.
Word of advice: Crabs in a Barrel is another phrase that will do nothing but keep our community down. Ask yourself how have you helped someone else achieve today?
* Feel free to ask any questions on how we structured our support group, I feel that everyone should start one.
Posts
10 comments:
Loved this article. We really do need to support each other more.
Thank you! Philosopher thank you for the support on my blog also!
It's going to take a Super Crab to get out of the barrel we have ourselves in. The way I have learned how to deal with it is to support someone then go and do my own thing. You always have to watch out that people really want to have the spotlight and it doesn't really manifest until we get to the top. So you have to be willing to support then leave to do your own thing. I never expect people to be the same back to me, but since I can see the problem I should be part of the solution.
By the way love the direction the blog is going now. I like that we are talking about the problems and what we are doing to solve them.
Freeman- Thank you! I think that so often we talk about the issues that are effecting us, but we never really do anything about it. Hopefully we can discover together some solutions for all of these problems.
I hear you. The whole phenomenon is so frustrating. I, for one, vow never to partake. Congrats on your group and I wish you much success.
Shine- Thank you for your support! I hope the group goes well. You know I will tell yall what the outcome is.
shame aint it
i've always believe it is never about the individual. oppression is forced on the entire group. we can't integrate one by one. thats ultimately defeatist. ujima: collective work and responsibility. that has to be more than a kwaanza principle. it has to be a life principle.
i think this affects other cultures to besides black..
good article..
This affects ALL cultures. Any person who is jealous, doesn't like people who do their work and study hard. There are some white people like this who don't like other whites getting ahead. I've seen middle class and poor whites, jealous of their rich counterparts, attempting to pull them back down to their level. Blacks seem to be more like this because they are seen as one thing, and a lot of the members are near the bottom. So you get the crabs in a barrel phenomenon writ large across an entire group of people. I love black people, but sometimes they can be a bit much to deal with. Idk how many times I've been accused of "thinking I'm white" by other blacks. It's annoying and painful. No other group will accept me as an equal, and I don't want to live at the bottom of the barrel. I could be accepted by whites as an uncle tom, but that's about it. So right now I spend a lot of time alone, trying to date black girls who are suspicious that I might be a flight risk because of my academic and social success. I want to date inside my race, I don't want a white woman or asian woman who want some mythological mandingo for a husband or boyfriend. I want a girl who wants me for me, and isn't afraid to go weird places, watch interesting movies, and read odd books. Yes, I'm an oreo, and I wear the badge proudly, but it doesn't mean I don't like being black. It simply means I am okay with the dominant culture, which is a requirement to live in this civilization. Doesn't mean I can't have a black racial identity, though. Right now I'm looking for a wife, and maybe I'm having a difficult time because of my less-than-stellar social skills. I hope that's the case, at least.
Post a Comment