Jabari Inspires: "Bask In YOUR Basket List!"

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Season's Greetings...

Season's Greetings from The Socialite! I want to wish everyone a happy holidays. I hope that everyone takes time to truly focus on the people that matter most to them. Tis the season to give, and giving is a lot more than material things. Make sure that you are spending quality time with your love ones.

As we wrap this year up, I want you to take time to reflect on all of the blessings that you have received throughout 2010. Think about the good and not so great moments, and reflect on how it has added to your growth process.

The greatest gift that you can receive this year is happiness and being proud of the many blessings you have received. If you are thankful for this alone this holiday, you will give God the gift he always wanted.

I want everyone to also take a moment to rest their minds, cause if you are going into 2011 still reading imkeepingup.com, then you are in for a mind blowing experience. Prepare to JUMP into your goals for next year. I hope you are ready for the ride that will lead you to living the life that was meant for you.

May your holidays be filled with joy!

-The Socialite

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Never Let a Rookie Take Your Spot...

"One piece of advice for next year, never let a rookie take your spot!" -Love & Basketball

Being with your job for a good amount of time can cause you to become really comfortable, especially after you spent months proving yourself and really letting it be known that you deserve to have a place in the company.

You started off always on time, new ideas flowing, networking with everyone around you, and emailed tons of questions to everyone showing that you were eager to learn all that you could.

Then the day came where you were confident that everyone understood your worth and you became "a regular employee". Of course you remained impressive by doing the minimum amount of work to the best of your ability, but the new kid on the block mentality went down the drain. You weren't as eager to show up to work at 7:30am, ideas came when they were asked for, and you figured people should be emailing you questions by now. The rookie attitude was out the door, and the comfortable veteran was sitting at your desk now.

What you didn't realize is that a new rookie would be joining your team. A rookie with the same drive and eagerness to prove would be stepping in ready to shine. You would have to think quick, and figure out how to not get drowned out by this new kid with fresh ideas.

Rookies or new hires come into companies all of the time. You should not become so comfortable in your job that you lose that eagerness to do great at your job. You are always competing and at any moment a rookie can come in and take your place. Don't wait last minute to try to get back on top of your game....stay on top of your game.

When a rookie joins your team, you should be the one that they immediately want to train this new person, not the person they are seeking to replace.

The quote above was sent to me by one of my friends. She wanted to remind me to do just what the quote says "NEVER LET A ROOKIE TAKE YOUR SPOT". This applies to anything that you do. Always remain competitive and number one at what you do.

-The Socialite

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No One Man Should Have All This Power...

For the past few months I have been constantly approached by men who already have girlfriends. It is as if the concept of being in a committed relationship means very little and is simply something that is being said to either make his partner happy or to hold on to his partner while he messes around with other fish in the sea.

Do women make it easy for men to explore other options while in a relationship by allowing them to interact with us on intimate levels? Are we all so afraid that there are few good men in this world that we don't mind dating men in relationships in hopes that he will leave his woman and leap into a commitment with us?

It is like we have created monsters who attack at any prey that walks by them. He is not afraid to approach women because there is no fear of a woman rejecting him because of his relationship status. Furthermore, he understands how much power he has because of the lack of great men, and is now sitting on his high horse.

I've been guilty of considering having "friendships" with guys in relationships to see if anything could spark out of it, but realized that my consideration was a mere act of weakness. Why disregard the feelings of the other woman and most importantly allow this man to have his cake and eat it too? This guy asked if we could just be friends? I asked him if his girl would be joining us on any dinner or movie outings? Of course that was a no go. I let him know that my comfort level of the situation was at an all time low, and the terms of our friendship lead me to believe that he wants more (ya boy run that game...not buying it)

It has always been said that women hold the power, but we easily release that power when we allow him to dibble and dabble where ever he sees fit. We are not being fair to ourselves or our fellow black woman. The fact that Lil Wayne has everyone reciting "I'm single for the night" or Waka having everyone yell out "Got a Main Bitch and a Mistress" shows where we are in society in terms of the female/male relationship.

Men are going to be men and probably will always consider swimming around in the sea, but as females we don't have to take their bait. Once they have fewer options in the sea, they will do less swimming. (This can be challenging ladies I know...but we have to do something about this. We must maintain self-control)

The Socialite

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Someone Wants To Fight Me...Square Off Then!

Ding Ding Ding...the bell goes off, gloves are on, and you are pumping yourself up ready to turn around to face your opponent. The fans are cheering ready to see the match, and your haters are passing bets around that you will lose. You finally are ready, and when you turn around you realize your oponent is you.

As the New Year approaches and you prepare to re-evaluate yourself & your goals, realize that you are approaching your beginning of the year boxing match. Your 2010 self is competing against your 2011 self. Have you ever heard that you are your biggest competition? Every year you should be competing to do better than you did the year before. But really treat it as if it is a match. You must truly knock out the competition (yourself). It has to be a clear winner, so you want to go extra hard.

Everyone comes up with their list of changes they want to make in the New Year, and after about a month the list of goals end up somewhere misplaced. You forget about the plans you have for yourself, and at the end of the year you are wondering why things seem the exact same? That is why I say treat it like a huge boxing match. Pump yourself up as much as you can to truly become better than you were the year before.

The first thing that you must do to prepare for this boxing match is to evaluate your opponents. You must truly think about everything that you accomplished this year. Then of course like tradition think about everything you can do better. But instead of just writing it down, you need to study your list (your competition). Figure out how you can truly become better and win.

Examples:

Goal:
I want to be in better shape.

Fighting approach:

1. Read up on different techniques to tackle the areas that you are looking to approve on.
2. Seek advice from personal trainers, or friends you know that work out.
3. Find the place where you are going to train.
4. Find a work out partner so that together you can push yourself
5. Set up a work out plan
6. Tell 5 other people so they can hold you accountable
7. Go further than your workout plan, change your eating habits as well

You get the point. Instead of just writing out a simple goal, you need to write out everything you need to do to achieve your goal.

When you write out one line goals, you are not doing what it takes to truly knock out the competition. If 2011 plans on being your champion year, you have to think like a pro. They plan and tackle every possible area of improvement. They don't just say they want to win, they work around the clock training on how to achieve this. And when you start writing out a plan instead of just a goal, you are putting more energy into the universe that you truly want to accomplish this goal. You need to take this approach in the New Year. Go harder than you ever have gone before. When the ding ding ding sounds again, your 2010 self should be knocked out on the ground, and it should be clear that you have won the match. 2011 should end with you accomplishing all of your goals, going places you never have been, trying food you have never tasted, looking better than you ever have before, and anything else that puts you over the top from the year before.

Year boxing match begins in a few more weeks, are you preparing to be better than this year? GO hard....every year needs to be better than the year before. I don't know about you, but all my haters betting against me...will lose!

Change your New Years Resolution into a Boxing Match Preparation List! Let's get ready to rumble...

-The Socialite

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Secret To A Billion Dollar Idea

After watching The Social Network for the first time (so late) a huge question came to me; are you motivated by money or passion? I begin to wonder what separates the "greats" from people who are just successful? What makes someone become known as the best in their field or craft? What leads someone to billion dollar ideas like Bill Gates and Mark Zuckerberg?

I sat in the movies and watched a guy dedicate hour after hour to a network idea, without ever thinking about the idea of making money, and more about creating the best social network to ever hit the Internet. I watched a guy sit at his laptop and never stop at adding new features to his site that could take his creation to the next level. While people around him wondered about how much money could be made from this creation, and others sat around partying away because of small triumphs, Mark dedicated his time to simply creating.

Is that the secret? Everyone is motivated by different things, but is the secret to huge success to concentrate more on creating the best product you can, and not worrying about how much money it will generate? Do you stop looking for the secret to a billion dollar idea, and focus more on just creating an extremely amazing product?

It seems to me that if you take the time to really study those people that we consider extremely successful in their fields, or the "best" in their fields, most of them spent more time focused on their actual talent or product, then the actual money aspect. Bill Gates wanted to make software, Jay Z wanted to be the best rapper, and Mark Zuckerberg wanted to create the greatest social network. They put hours into just that, and as a result success and money came.

Don't get me wrong, there is probably not that many people in the world that don't think about money, and of course that probably was a goal for them all, but which part did they focus the most on?

When your goal is simply money, then at any point it is thrown your way, you can give up on your vision. Think about people who sold their ideas just to make millions, and now their products are worth billions. The founder of Victoria Secret come to mind when I think of people who let go of their vision early in the game. I think about rappers who were so excited when they got their first checks,that rapping is a thing of the past for them. Money was their ultimate goals, and thus they lost focus very soon in the game.

I know that for a lot of people it is hard to stay focused on their ideas and goals when money comes into play, because a lot of people never had. So I truly understand the struggle that a lot of people have. But if at some point people are able to get pass this thirst for something they never had, and concentrate on putting all they can into their craft, the money will come. The success will surely come.

Most "greats" seem to never stop creating and taking their ideas to the next level. These people clearly are thinking beyond the dollar bills. I am not sure what makes a person successful at the end of the day, and I am sure there are tons of things. One thing is for sure, there is nothing in the world that could stop a person who is passionate about their craft.

One thing that stuck out to me in the movie was when Mark was asked what is the end goal of Facebook? He said there is no end. He said it is like fashion, it keeps going and re-creating itself. When you think like this, you are willing to put the work in to expand on your product or idea. When you think that the end is making money, you stop as soon as the money comes.


What motivates you...money or passion?

-The Socialite

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The "Zuckerberg Effect"

It is absoutly amazing that Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg has been named Time's Person of the Year. Facebook is connecting people from all over the world, and because of its great success, Zuckerberg is now worth 6.9 billion dollars. At 26 he can say he is in a league of his own.

Being around the same age as Zuckerberg and seeing his success at such a young age, it is one of the recent events that has encouraged me to go at my goals at full speed. We all have a little Zuckerberg in us. We all have the ability to take a small idea in our head and turn it into something great.

The issue is that we think that we have tons of time to accomplish our goals. We also are afraid to just go for what we want. It is like we are waiting for someone to come and place an amazing opportunity in front of us. You might be waiting a lifetime for luck to play out in your favor.

If there is one thing that I learned from watching the inspiring Mark story unfold, is that you have to take the torch...people are not just going to give it to you. You must go after what you want out of life, and when you get it, take it to the highest level that you can.

There should be a "Zuckerberg Effect" going on amongst our peer group. Everyone should be in their rooms trying to figure out what the world can use next. What does the world need and want? How are you going to change the world?

Find the Zuckerberg in you now!!!

-The Socialite

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DO SOMETHING CRAZY!

Alright, time to eliminate ourselves from the calculated lives we live. On the count of 3 everybody think of a crazy goal, place you want to visit, food you want to try, or something you want to say to someone. Don't put tons of hours of thought into it. Don't second guess yourself. Don't stop because you think that it sounds crazy.

At one point airplanes, the Internet, and organic food was just a crazy idea in some ones head.

We only have one shot at this thing called life...take this world for all its got.

TODAY DO SOMETHING CRAZY! Just JUMP.

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